Wednesday, September 3, 2014

When the words don't come

Over the last year, my eyes have been opened to a heartbreaking concept more than normal. If you read my blog, which I seldom post on, you know that we experienced a miscarriage last December. It was devastating. Can I look back and see God's perfect timing now - Yes. Can I see God's perfect plan - Yes. Am I beyond thrilled that we have Baby Mills awaiting meeting us in 6 weeks - More than words can say.


Yesterday, I got a phone call from a precious friend that just recently had a miscarriage. I had sent her a text checking on the babe I knew was in her belly and she called to let me know that their sweet babe was in Heaven. We had a smile and laugh over our babies laughing and worshiping in Heaven together. Then - I didn't know what else to say. I just had a miscarriage less than a year ago, but words just wouldn't come.

First, I felt guilty that I was pregnant again after my miscarriage. Did my friend want me to feel guilty - no! She is thrilled for the life growing and forming inside of me. It breaks my heart that so often we don't have the words to say when someone experiences a miscarriage - because it shouldn't be that way. We've been there - so many of us. I've said more times than I can count... "I have more friends who have had a miscarriage than have not had one." That is an alarming statistic. It is common. Devastating. But very common.

We're so silent about it, which I feel is why the words don't come to so many of us. Even those of us who have walked that road often don't know what to say. Silence - we're so silent about many things in our life. If you're my friend- you know I'm not a very silent person. When I'm hurting, people know. When I'm stressed, people know. Is this a good quality? I have no idea, probably not - but I rely on those people. Why? Because when I'm broken or in pain or hurting- they lift me up. Even when they don't have the words- their presence is what I need. Their presence reminds me that God loves me and desires us to live in communion with one another. Jesus had 12 disciples He did life with for a reason. For a reason He wants us to follow. We're not called to be in this life alone. So for those people in your life - be present. Even when the words don't come. And when you're hurting - maybe let them in a little more. No- they probably don't have the words to say, but their presence might be all you really need.

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