I've been holding myself back from moving forward in my own life. I desperately want to get involved at our new church. Truth: Sometimes I feel like an insecure middle schooler. Will they like me? Do I dress like them? Do they even want a new friend?
I've been going back and forth about going to this mom's devotional group on Wednesday mornings. I work part-time for now. This may be one of my only opportunities to attend a stay at home mom type devotional group for a while. Fear creeps in: Have they already all bonded? Do they all know eachother already?
I love teenagers. I love investing in high school girls. I find the most fulfillment in it, it brings me the most joy. Fear keeps on creeping: Will my story matter to them? Will they accept me as my past girls did?
Yesterday I sat at church and listened to our Pastor talk about how we have to live and trust God or we may miss out on something BIG He has for us.
I listened to my husband singing about how we have no one to fear for the God of angel armies is on OUR SIDE.
Through these words I heard God whispering in my ear to "Let Go." He's not asking me to forget. He's not asking me to replace friends or my sweet small group girls. He's asking me to move forward. To trust that He brought us to Vestavia for a reason. He brought not just Chris but ME to Vestavia for a reason. He has more for me in this place than to just be Hutton's Mommy and Chris' wife.
Thank you Lord that you want to use a person full of faults to share your love.
I feel the same thing too Jess! But, like you said, we have to move forward and believe that God still has great things for us to do. Miss you and our small group sweet friend :)
ReplyDelete1) I'm obsessed with that song. Heard it for the first time at the adoption mom retreat this weekend. Of COURSE your amazing family is already on the ball knowing the brand-new worship stuff! :)
ReplyDelete2) GO TO THE WEDNESDAY MORNING MOM GROUP!!!
3) I don't know if they want a new friend. But I was too busy working/CPA studying to want a new friend when you waltzed in my world and IT DIDN'T MATTER that I wasn't shopping for new friends, because you're too incredible to pass up! They'll think they same thing!
4) You're the cutest dresser I know. Don't worry about that.
5) The SJ youth group was more amazing than I realized. I miss them, and I wasn't even involved with them at the level you were. That said, who knows how the youth at your new church will be... I don't know. But I do know that they NEED young women like you who have HEARTS for God and them! So whether they accept you right away or it takes a little while, JUST KEEP ON IT! They need you, and you're gifted for it.
6) I adore you.
7) I miss you.